My Recent Experience at the Masjid (Mosque)

As Salam Alaikum friends! Hope you are all doing well today.

Today I’m breaking away from the technical stuff associated with Islam and posting a personal story of mine, my recent trip to the masjid. VERY UNCOMFORTABLE EXPERIENCE!

Now, everyone knows Muslims go to the masjid to pray and seek Allah primarily, but, there is a social aspect to it as well. Many people like to see friends and chat for a while before or after prayer. That’s normal. It’s a way to connect with our community. Sadly, we are losing our community to selfishness and rude behavior and I am a witness to that.

So, last Friday I went to Jummah prayer. I haven’t been to the masjid in a while before that day. That in itself should not matter as to how fellow Muslims treat you. Anyway, I walk into the prayer area and give my salams to the entire group of women in the room. Loud enough so that everyone can hear of course. What I get in return…..almost silence! A few salams back but nothing what I expected. Now, you might be thinking, “so what”, but, you have to understand this isn’t the first time this has happened to me.

I remember when I first reverted and would go to the masjid pretty often, even days other than Fridays. I would see the same faces. There were a couple sweet sisters who would chat with me, but the majority stuck to their little clicks. This is not what our ummah is supposed to be about. We are supposed to support each other, offer assistance when needed, give our salams, respect each other….what happened to all of this!

This is a real problem with new Muslims , as they need alot of assistance in learning the deen. When I first reverted , there were a few wonderful sisters who offered to help out but they have since stopped going to the masjid for whatever reason. Maybe the same reason I am choosing not to go back. YES, I said it…I am not going back. Women aren’t obligated to go anyway and if I am going to be treated like a piece of furniture, to be ignored, then I choose to pray to Allah in the comfort of my own home.

Now that I think about it, it may just be the masjid I attend but that’s doubtful. You see this treatment even outside of the masjid, on the streets even.

So, now my rant is over. I may consider looking into a different masjid or not. Right now I am bitter towards the whole idea. Allah will not reward me any less if I don’t attend so why feel uncomfortable while I am praying! Ugh.

Well friends, thanks for letting me vent and for reading. May Allah keep you happy, healthy and safe. Ameen

Salam, Amani

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. kazemah
    Apr 10, 2012 @ 10:48:51

    Wa alaykum salam. I’ve had experiences like this at a certain masjid as well. It’s very discouraging. My husband would keep saying go again and see if it’s different, but it wasn’t. And it was ramadan of all times. But another masjid I go to is the complete opposite. If I’m sitting alone, a sister will come up and ask how I’m doing, about my kids, and much more. Once they had made a circle for a sister’s nikkah and I didn’t wanna intrude so I didn’t join. They were like ‘hey sis, come on.’ It made me feel so welcome and I felt true sisterhood from a complete stranger, who loved me simply because I’m muslim. Who loved me for the sake of Allah, without hesitation. I write this to say, don’t let one masjid shape your opinion of them all. Some masjids have sisters waiting with open arms, literally lol.

    Reply

    • Amani
      Apr 10, 2012 @ 10:53:01

      Salam sis, thanks for the encouraging words. I am thinking about finding a new masjid but right now I think I just need to get over this experience. Iโ€™m sure they are not all like that but itโ€™s discouraging to go through that over and over. Very uncomfortable to say the least. Thanks again. May allah bless you and your family. Ameen
      xoxo Amani

      Reply

  2. towardsfalah
    Apr 10, 2012 @ 12:14:35

    I’ve had similar experiences and I too found some congregations more inviting than others. It helps to know at least one person but it might also help to contact the mosque and talk about the issue… if you’re feeling it, chances are others are too. It would do a world of good for the ummah if they were made aware of the problem – and it is a problem in many social settings. Hugs sister.

    Reply

    • Amani
      Apr 10, 2012 @ 16:29:57

      Thats a shame you had to go through it also. Actually, it was brought up at Jummah several times but nothing has changed. Sad to say some people are just rude I guess. I have an email in to a different masjid to get info from them. Salam, Amani p.s. thanks for the comment ๐Ÿ™‚

      Reply

  3. AJ
    Apr 13, 2012 @ 19:39:00

    Amani,

    First of all, welcome to Islam ๐Ÿ™‚ Secondly, I am so sorry that you had this experience. I have lived in a few different states and have attended a few different mosques. I have noticed that in big cities where there would be a larger population from a certain cultural group, there will be more of the cliques that you are talking about. But in Charlottesville, the last city I was in before moving to Saudi Arabia, we didn’t have one particular group since it was a smaller city. So people from different cultures talked with each other. Don’t let that negative experience stop you from visiting the same mosque. Also, at different times and days, there are different people in the mosque. So try a few different days and time and insh’Allah (I will pray for you), you will find a few likeminded ladies. I am not a revert and even I have problems getting into groups that are already formed but keep in mind these groups wouldn’t be open to new friendships anyway. So keep on the lookout for the unattached ones – you might form a new rewarding friendship.

    A.

    Reply

    • Amani
      Apr 14, 2012 @ 06:20:50

      AJ, Thanks so much for the encouragement I think I may try your suggestions as well as look for another Masjid. Thanks for reading also. ๐Ÿ™‚
      Amani

      Reply

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